Beginnings.

Blogging scares me. I don’t really know why but it does. So much so that it’s taken me almost a year of consideration to start one, and a few months of tinkering until I finally posted (ok, maybe I’m more obsessive than scared). But now that I have five good (I think) reasons to blog, and maybe even some sub-reasons, I’m taking the plunge.

1. Connecticut is far away from many places. This is a sad fact of life. And our far away family and maybe even some of our friends like hearing what we’re up to. Let’s just say I’m not the best with the old telephone… so I’m hoping some pretty pictures and my witty prose will make up for my lackluster (or lack of) phone conversations.

2. I need to actually do some of the projects that are planned in my head. Or at least do something interesting, and not just watch Friday Night Lights every night (“Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose!”). I figure a blog will help light a fire under my you-know-what and force me to try things. Because I have to have something to write about, after all. Of course, now that you know this, if you don’t see a post for a while, you’ll know what’s up. I’m sitting on my keister watching Tim Riggins flip his greasy hair.

3. I’m a pretty private person. I know what you’re thinking. “That’s sad, she doesn’t know what a blog is.” I know, blogs are the opposite of private. But I’m trying to be a little more open, a little more okay with showing my imperfections, and a little less concerned about the opinions of others. I’m basically doing exposure therapy on myself by putting little bits of my life on the internet for all the world (read: my family) to see.

4. I gave up scrapbooking. Let’s be honest, I’ll never print all those pictures. But I still want to document our lives. And I like to write. I’m probably better at writing than cutting straight with those swirly edge scrapbooking scissors anyway. Win-win!

5. I’m trying to live differently. More simply, more graciously, more fully. In recovering from the stress of grad school and years of being overcommitted, I’ve realized that I don’t want to live the rest of my life that way. I’m tired of being stressed out and irritable and anxious about everything, and I think that the answer to that lies in slowing down and taking time to appreciate (and experience) the life I have.

In the past, I’ve been wary of blogs because I felt like they sometimes presented a perfect picture of the blogger’s life in a way that can make the readers feel inferior (which I realize reflects more on my own insecurities than it does on blogging). But having read several blogs that have encouraged and inspired me, I’ve started to realize that I can be “real” while still focusing on the joy, inspiration and beauty in life. In fact, maybe looking for those things in order to write about them will lead me into deeper gratitude and appreciation for them. Maybe I will be quicker to recognize the good around me, and I’ll actually live more fully because I am focusing on it and processing it through writing. Or maybe blogging won’t do that. But it’s worth a shot.

So there you have it. My humble entrance into the blogosphere. Clearly I have high hopes for this baby. But if it turns out to be just entertaining, that’s cool too. I’ll need something to do when Friday Night Lights ends.